When You Find Your Tribe

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yours is the light by which my spirit’s born: yours is the darkness of my soul’s return –you are my sun,my moon,and all my stars

 -e.e. cummings

In celebration of our super blood moon…gather around a fire, anchor your soul to the earth and let your worries out with the waves.

Under a sky full of stars and a bright crescent moon they gathered on the beach after dusk, stoked the fire and shared their stories. Trials, heartache, lessons. Was it the lunar cycle or their age? No matter, it’s obvious these women are in the thick of it. Being in the thick of it doesn’t leave much time for introspection or grace or forgiveness. But they make time for THIS each month—to spark their intellect and seek self-truth, collectively.

The fire ring is always a special night. Around the circle they opened their hearts and overruled their heads, writing down their fears their mistakes their ugliness their anxieties—anything they ached to LET GO. And they did. They burned the very words that weigh them down, and force them to slog through each day wearing waterlogged boots in sticky black mud. Inhaling the smoke of sweet sage, they watched the papers burn and finally gave a deep exhale. Cue the shooting star…

As the moon set over the ocean they wove themselves into a web of cerulean wool–creating a giant truss to honor their connectedness, and leaving a token on their wrists (encircled 11 times, once for each member of the group). The sky was a deep ink by then, punctured delicately by millions of stars nearly crowding the constellations.

Eight silhouettes on a quiet beach, watching the whitecaps of waves pulse against the milky way and lap at the shore—an insistent invitation to the sea. They gratefully (and some quite bravely) obliged, peeling off their layers for salty nightswimming and starlit shimmying. Later, they dried themselves by the fire and passed around the last of the Prosecco, soaking up summer and the solace of their tribe.

A Clean Slate: New Year Resolutions

A Clean Slate: New Year Resolutions

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I think the New Year can be a real mixed bag. On the one hand, as you near the end of the year you are celebrating and pushing every excess you might dare, knowing that January 1 offers you a clean slate. You feel invincible, and that anything you've done to yourself and others can be erased with a swish of a calendar page. On the other hand, you're coming down from extraordinary high times...time off work, time with loved ones, time alone, party time! Creating a balance, and a way to ease into the New Year is a challenge. I used to spend lots of time setting my "Goals" for each new January. Then I realized that I NEVER GO BACK AND REVIEW THEM. And they sit quietly, patiently waiting for me, in the lovely red journal I bought for myself more than five years ago. What's different this year? I'm limiting myself to this post, and 10 minutes to jot down a few manageables. We don't have time to belabor this, do we? I want to make shit happen.

Make Your Magic

I've broken it down to a few categories that provide plenty of room for multiple resolutions. Three's a crowd? Just pick one or two. Rules? Keep it simple and direct. Active not passive. "Oh, so I'm going to be more healthy."  "I'm packing healthy snacks to bring to work everyday."

1. Micro-Resolution: Pick something tiny! I strongly believe it's the little things that make a difference. My husband made a mid-year resolution to make the bed everyday. He's done it, kept to it, and receives uber satisfaction from the practice. Gretchen Rubin gives this little change A LOT of attention in The Happiness Project, which is essentially a year of resolutions. I consider her an expert on the subject.

2. Health Resolution: Who hasn't picked something health-related as a new year resolve? Go for it! If you have a list of desired changes, try setting and achieving them quarterly instead of tackling them all right out of the gate. Set the goal, establish the habit for three months, then hit up another. Bam!

3. Personal/Professional/Parental Resolution: Sure, you can establish one for each of your personas. OR  just focus on ONE area that needs extra attention: "I'm saying 'yes' to my kids as often as possible." or "I'm only going to swear at work if it's an actual emergency." or "I'm going to increase my sociability and engage with the other soccer moms instead of playing Words With Friends on my iPhone."

4. Maintenance Resolution: Say Yes to Success! What's one thing you have accomplished or felt great success from in 2013? Will you vow to keep it going? Maintaining is almost MORE critical than creating the habit. Plus, it's nice to have a leg up on one of your resolutions. Consider it an easy win.

Extra Credit

New Year's Magic: An article published yesterday in The Atlantic, sparked my curiosity about the parallels of religion and New Year's traditions (excess, celebration, coming clean).

Making New Year's Resolutions: 5 Key Questions to ask Yourself, at The Happiness Project

Power of Positive Thinking

Image I firmly believe that our thoughts and passions (for better or worse) can be channeled to fruition. However that does not mean I live my life passively, depending solely on optimism, visualization, magic spells and meditation. I'm ready to grab it, and take action, with the following rules guiding my steps:

  • Think positively.

Yes! Think and act with optimism and gratitude, and you will attract the good stuff. The opposite is true if you are negative, bitter, and trapped in your ego.

  • Believe in magic.

BELIEVE. Have faith in what you cannot see.

  • Work hard.

You cannot be lazy and passive. You must act and be proactive. Good things DON'T just happen to those who WAIT. Are you kidding me? Get up.

  • Play well with others.

We need to love our families, respect our neighbors, adore our friends, and tolerate our enemies. It works. The nicer you are, the more amazing the results. I know sometimes it hurts. But try it.

  • Document your dreams.

Write it down. Yes, a vision board is lovely, but it's been proven to me time and again, writing stuff down is so important. Did you know it's been scientifically shown that WRITING your goals (dreams and desires!) contributes greatly to their actualization. This works in combination with accountability and commitment. Shocking! right? Okay, now grab a buddy and get on program.

Wish List

This Christmas couldn't go by without a little wishing...it's tough because I love so many things!

From the Top Left and Around Clockwise: GIANT PHOTO in San Diego...there are a few images of my own that I'd love to BLOW up HUGE, get mounted, and hang in the house. I'm not sure if they have gift certificates, but bet they'd accommodate if one asked...

Tiffany & Co. monogram pendants. What could be wrong with a little blue box? I love this in both silver and gold. Very classy.

Domino, alas, my favorite decorating magazine went under this year. Thankfully, before doing so, they published this book- Domino: the Book of Decorating. Love love.

Next up, my Belkin car adapter bit the dust, and I thought maybe I should kick it old school with this Monster tape adapter which with also play tunes off my iPhone. Whoo Hoo!

I know I've said it before, maybe on the TFD blog, but I really dig this 20X200 idea--which makes editions of artworks affordable for all. This work, Vogue JUL07:pg145 (Ripeness is All) is by San Fran artist Lauren DiCioccio. This and the other Vanity Fair MAY08:pg269 (and, incredibly, looking not a day older) are two together that would be LOVELY.

What gal doesn't need a good steamer to save on dry cleaner and make ironing easier? Just thought of it. Rowenta Ultra Steam Model, it even comes with the GoodHousekeeping seal of approval.

Something for writing just had to show up on this list. Keel's Simple Diary. How cheery is that yellow? It comes in a rainbow of colors and I'm quite sure it's available at Anthropologie, among other fine establishments.

Though I've never used one, the Yudu seems like a super cool and easy way to do screenprinting at home. I first saw it at Michaels then noticed it's major tele-shopping site. Weird, but so cool.

Rounding out this list is the ever magical Jo Malone cologne. Lime Basil Mandarin is soopa fresh, Jasmine Mint is a soft romantic note on my skin, and the special edition Dark Amber Lily and Ginger is so seductive. Yum, and yum. Saks, Bloomies, Nordstroms (online, but maybe not in the store).

I also really like pedicures, Starbucks, super dark chocolate, art supplies, time at home to myself, and someone to fold the laundry and clean house. I'm easy. Merry Christmas Santa!

Bird's Eye View

It's been my dream (since forever) to have a treehouse. Unfortunately, even growing up with oak filled lawns in the Midwest, I never had the opportunity to realize this vision. In the sixth grade we were given a project to create and design a dream house (these were my favorite type of assignments) and I created a treehouse. The plans were two dimensional of course, but my sky high fantasy was modern and earthy, sophisticated yet cozy. I am reminded of this because of a recent post by decorology on "Amazing Treehouses I Would Live In."

While I don't see a treehouse in the future of our landscape, I do think the view we have affords a similar sense of freedom and peace. Instead of pining away for the day I might have my own nest, I thought it best to explore options for visiting such marvels of architecture.

Make your reservations today!
Cedar Creek Treehouse at Mount Rainer

Tree House Lodge, Costa Rica

Sanya Nanshan Treehouse Hainan Island, China

Post Ranch Inn, Big Sur, California, USA